The Truth About Teething

I feel as if it's been so long since I last wrote anything, that I can barely remember how.

Or perhaps it's not that I can't remember, but more that I am currently trapped in a teething nightmare which saps any kind of creativity from my very soul.

Teething. Yet another thing to add to my ever growing list of things I was oh-so-mistaken about.

I imagined, in my innocent, uncorrupted, pre-baby mind, that teething was merely an event, by which one was kept awake by a crying baby for a one night, and then - Voila! A tooth would appear and happiness would once again ensue.

Ha. Ha. Ha. hahahahahahahahahhahahahahha

No.

Teething is not this beautiful joyous coming-of-age story. In fact, rather than falling into the genre of heartwarming/obstacle-overcoming/chick-flick, it really falls much more neatly into a frankenstein thriller/suspense/far-too-long/horror/slasher/gorey movie mashup.

It's been six days since my husband first noticed that there was a tooth on the way. Each day, it's moving closer and closer to the surface. We can see it through the gum line. Getting whiter, and whiter and 'surely it must be through by now' .... but it isn't. The gum gets redder, her nose gets snottier, she dribbles so badly we are changing bibs hourly. So much misery created by one little (although it does look massive in her mouth) tooth.

Bubs has become clingy in all new ways. She has now started screaming when I leave her at day care. Literally, screaming. Crawling across the floor, tears streaming, screaming.

It is absolutely horrendous. I feel like I am torturing her. In fact, just two days ago, for no reason at all, I was overwhelmed with the feeling that I was letting her down in some unimaginable way. She wasn't even home. I very nearly rang the daycare to check that she was ok.

And so, as the days tick on, she now doesn't want her food and we are back to multiple bottles of formula a day. She won't open her mouth for bonjela, she refuses to bite her teething ring. She cries and screams and squirms and won't let anyone hold her except for me, unless I am not in the room and she can't see or hear me.

Because she won't open her mouth, we have to hold her upside down to see if the tooth is through yet. She does love that, I must admit, she thinks it's great fun. But it does make me feel slightly guilty, that we aren't doing it for her benefit.

So, tooth number one is on it's way.

Only 25 more to go.