Baby Proof Fence

As Little Bean begins to figure out that she can move herself around, I begin to notice the veritable death trap my house is. Granted, at the moment she can only push herself round in circles, but it wont be long before those circles become horizontal across floor movement, which in no time will become vertical grabbing motions.

And so, I have begun to baby proof.

Luckily for me, I have a friend with a one year old who sometimes visits. These have become exercises in 'how fast can I move everything higher than 1m above ground level', now executed with almost military precision. I say almost because on christmas day I had done an excellent job of clearing all the surfaces of everything. My house looked pristine and very, very safe for children. That was until said one year old arrived, and promptly headed straight for the plate of nibbles I had festively placed on the coffee table.

I have never seen a scorched almond vanish so quickly.

Needless to say, this one year old was in no hurry to spit out such a delectable treat, and so ensued a somewhat farcical series of 'spit it out love', 'don't run with food in your mouth' and 'it's ok, if we need to I know how to do the heimlich manouvere' (which of course I did, years ago. I'm not convinced I could have performed it now, and I'm not even sure that you are supposed to do it on a one year old).

Lesson learnt. Scorched almonds are not safe for children.

I also hold out little hope that we will have a christmas tree next year. Apparently all those shiny decorations are simply too good to resist.

To everyone who gave me warehouse vouchers for christmas. Little Bean and I thank you. They have been spent on latches for cupboards, safety cabels to stop flat screen tvs tipping over, plastic floor mats for under high chairs, electric socket protectors and cute things to stop doors slamming on fingers. We also have a new entertainment unit thanks to Trademe, which ensures that the spaghetti junction of cables required to keep our lounge running, are all safely tucked out of toddler's reach.

Now I just need to figure out where to put all our liquor...