Saturday 10 January 2015

Telling Lies on Facebook

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a person in possession of a facebook page, must carefully curate what is posted.

And this sucks.

Seriously.

I have a strong hate-love-hate relationship with the social media giant, in that I hate that I love it, and also love that I hate it. It messes with me, as you can tell.

I love that it means I don't lose touch with old friends who I actually care about, or overseas friends who I would never see. Because let's be honest, writing letters is hard work and phone calls are expensive...and tricky when you start to forget a language you once 'kind of spoke for a while'. To be brutal, most of my friends would have vanished from my periphery, to be swallowed up by the endless pull of real life, never to be seen or heard from again, if it weren't for easy one line status updates and posting of photos straight from your phone.

Because I suck at keeping in touch.

But you have to take the good with the bad, and oh boy there is some bad! It comes in tricky disguises, not the obvious 'Gah, my day is sucking so bad' vague status updates of that friend who seems to need constant reassurance (guilty). Or the 'this man went to stroke a tiger, what happens next WILL SHOCK YOU' click bait spam generated by computer illiterate old timey facebook friends *cough* family. No, no, no. The worst kind of bad there is on facebook, are the happy posts. The pretty posts, the 'I'm more in love with you every year' anniversary updates and 'here's me at the eiffel tower with my french beau having just a glorious time' holiday uploads, or the 'Hey guys, can't update right now because I have no internet connection because I'm helping baby turtles into the ocean in guatemala while building houses for humanity in a warzone and I have given my phone to an orphan' once a year posts from the off-the-grid friend who you literally never see anymore because, well, they are helping baby turtles and...just...GAH!

ENOUGH!

A picture speaks a thousand words. Which facebook certainly doesn't let you post...I don't think. But sometimes pictures obscure the truth, blur the edges of a sharp reality and hide what you don't want others to see. Status updates do the same thing but with words, which you edit and rewrite and think about until they are perfect, then you click 'post'.

Here are some pictures taken yesterday by our friend and photographer Raewyn Murray .

Don't we look amazing! The happiest most perfect and harmonious family, pretty much in the history of the world - and god my hair has grown!

Look at us, laughing and having so much fun (which we were). Nothing can break us apart! We are what everyone dreams of being. We have what everyone wants.


Sigh. Even I want that!

What you don't see amongst the incredible beauty (ha!), is that just half an hour before this, the wee one had been throwing a tantrum, screaming, refusing to be put down and crying loud grumpy tears for the better part of an hour, and we were at our wits end with how to make it stop.

What you also don't see is that earlier in the day, hubby and I had a huge fight in the middle of a park where we all but decided we should get a divorce. But then, what should we do with the child?

Photos may be beautiful, filtered works of art, and status updates often envy inducing slaps in the face. But as we approach our fifth wedding anniversary (and our tenth year of being together), we have learnt one thing for sure.

People only let you see what they want you to see. Life is hard. Love is harder and Facebook blurs the edges of it all.

xx